Making Friends with Internationals

by Pastor Juan

If you want to see the supernatural you need to be a doer of the Word, not merely a hearer of the Word of God. You hear the Word of God and apply it into your life and you will see the supernatural unfold. Your relationship with God will become better and you will understand His ways better.

We must have a world vision, a worldview even if we are Internationals. The gospels are all about Jesus making friends with sinners.

(Acts 8:26-39) Many people come from other countries to this country and have a desire to know God. They want to know the true God. Philip was available for God to use. I hope that we will be like Philip and available to be used by God in these last days.

1. Internationals come here primarily to study because education is our gateway for

success. Our second desire is to make an American friend.

2. You need to know that we feel lonely in this country. The three F’s – Friends, Family,

and Food.

3. Some of us are wealthy; others struggle financially.

4. International students are very intelligent.

5. Some are outspoken; others are timid, shy, and cautious.

6. Some of us are warm and affectionate; others are reserved and aloof. Most of us are

less expressive than Americans.

7. Friendship is relationship. Relationship takes time and commitment.

8. I don't make decisions independently but my whole family makes decisions with me.

That is why when an international receives Christ, one of the first things they will say is “What will my parents think about this? What will they say?" Because they value their family so much, they care about what will affect them. That’s why when I married Oi Lin I married the whole clan.

9. Some adjust to culture smoothly; others go into culture shock. Everyone is different.

10. Don’t assume and judge us. Asking questions is the best way to get to know one another.

Meals are the means to develop relationship. The most important part is the relationship itself. Friendship is sharing. Sharing in friendship is most important. International homes will serve you drinks. You don’t look at the watch. “Stay here for dinner, I’ll cook something for you.”

11. Communication is our entertainment. Internationals stop and talk. Americans walk by

and say “Hi! How are you?" and keep walking. We compare and share what we think. Fellowship is the thing. Fellowship without food is taboo. You must have food.

12. Don’t promise us that you will do something unless you actually plan to do it. If you

say, "I will call you", the International will wait by the phone and wait for you to call. If you don’t call and the next time you meet him and invite him to church, he will not come. Because your word is no longer valuable to them, we don’t feel we can trust in them. "I will call you," means "Within the next couple of days I will call you."

13. We define our identity by the groups to which we belong.

14. Tradition is very important to us. We respect older people. We never talk down to

them. We are never aggressive with them. We are always polite with them. In our culture older people always have the wisdom. We always value the opposite sex. In our culture we are not very expressive. Therefore, we are not very touchy. Whatever I do reflects back to my parents. My parent's name is at stake. “Whose child are you?" All people need to be respected even if they don’t know the Lord. This is biblical truth. We need to give honor to them.

15. Please know and learn our names and titles. We respect our elders. We never use first

names. We use "sir" or "maam", Dr. So and So. You raise your hand and say, “Sir, may I say something?” If the person is married, we say Mrs. Crall. It’s so hard to call her Jan. If someone has a title we use that title. Dr., Mr., Mrs. It’s used as a means of honor. We honor them.

16. We think differently.

17. Events take priority over time.

18. Our lack of initiative should not be interpreted as a lack of interest.

19. You need to speak slowly so that we can understand. Listen attentively. Don’t talk

down to us. If we don’t understand, explain things carefully. When we speak to you, we must think of it in our own language and interpret it to you. The process takes longer for us to express what we are thinking.

20. Direct confrontation or public disagreement is improper ethical conduct.

21. Be patient.

22. Don’t shy away from your commitment to Jesus.

Relationship, Friendship is the key to everything.

We need to make a lot of sacrifices. Make close friends. Reach out to others. Find someone to be in contact with. Go out and make friends, lasting, eternal relationships.